Day 40: Italian beach experiences: Past and future
(The present is cancelled)
Good things come to those who wait, and killer yoga made sure to prolong the experience. Turns out that being able to touch your toes does not make you a master of flexibility. Never trust an instructor who misspells her name on purpose (Kassandra, I’m looking at you).
One ibuprofen pill and three hours on the sofa later, and it’s already Saturday afternoon. The passing of time seems to be fast and slow at the same time; before I was reading an article from 16 March and was surprised to realise it was more than a month old.
Friday was a pleasant day, that involved mostly work and a lot of time in the kitchen. My natural wines arrived but my coloured markers didn’t, so at least the universe has its priorities straight when it comes to satisfying my basic needs.
The new protective beach setup proposal for Italian beaches has leaked, and this is what it looks like:
Going to the beach and being surrounded by plexiglass is not a bad idea, and when it gets really hot it will also save us money from going to spas, because you can now enjoy a natural sauna on the beach for as long as you like, until you pass out from a heat stroke.
This would add to my diverse portfolio of Italian beach experiences, which so far have greatly varied. My most civilised one has been at Forte dei Marmi, where they were practising social distancing before it was a thing. The gazebos had at least five metres of distance between them. Drinks were delivered directly to the sunbeds. We needed binoculars to see the sea, but all in all, it was dreamy. These guys won’t even need plexiglass. In fact, I might book a weekend there from now.
Then I had other experiences, like Sicily. This was a few years ago, when we went for the week of Ferragosto, the busiest holiday week in August. Strike one. Our first beach outing was planned for Riserva dello Zingaro, a natural reserve with beautiful, secluded bays, crystal clear waters and only nature surrounding you. It sounded ideal.
The warning signs started when we parked in a field that was labelled as a parking lot, and walked to a nearby shop/trailer to buy some essentials. The trailer had a sign that said something along the lines of : “This is the last shop you will find”. Armed with a parasol and a warm can of coke, we started making our way to the first bay, which was 800 metres away. The other warning signs manifested when there were people walking back from ‘the beach’ in hiking shoes. In the meantime, I was in my normal beach outfit, which consisted of an airy dress and flip flops. Strike two.
After a flip flop hike (not recommended) and loads of swearing under my breath, we finally made it to the bay. The beach was so packed, someone had perched up on the cliff, with a parasol and other paraphernalia. I had to literally walk along the shore (almost knee-deep in the water) to manage to get round to the other side, in hope of finding one square metre of paradise amidst the hell I had suddenly found myself in. Strike three. You see, it was a little windy, and I had underestimated the force of the waves, one of which came and literally smashed me to the ground. It was a mess. My dress was wet, my bag was wet, and an Italian man in speedos was rescuing my flip flops before they got swallowed up by the sea.
The great thing is that, with the plexiglass, at least we will still be able to enjoy all the speedos on display.
After the drama, we found a tiny rock to sit on, and I started drinking my warm Coke and adjusting to the experience. In front of us, there was a large Italian family with young children and an expert setup that consisted of a giant tent, three ice coolers and folding chairs. At some point, they took out a saucepan and a picnic gas burner, and started heating water. We never got to find out if they were making pasta or baby food, because we left a few seconds later.
I’m not sure what their plans are for summer 2020, but I think not even plexiglass will stop them.
Lunch: Mujaddara with (successfully) caramelised onions and tahini
Song of the day: Oni Ayhun - OAR003-B