Leaks and lockdowns

An Italian scientist walks into a bar

It feels like we have taken all the (backward) steps that had to be taken. Lockdowns have returned across Europe. Our Italian leaders, however, inspired by Boris Johnson circa April 2020, have decided to create a situation where they carry on to decidedly tell us that this is definitely not a lockdown, while leaving no options for anyone to do anything (because, as we’ve established, Covid likes fun).

We have an 11pm curfew, restaurants and bars have to close at 6, and shopping malls are shut (probably for the best), as well as gyms and sports centres. You can catch Covid at dinner, apparently, but not at lunch. So, for now, lunch is the new dinner, innovatively followed by an early aperitivo.

People are still free to roam the streets, and coincidentally, the only people that choose not to wear masks here are the same ones that cough and sneeze like their life depends on it (though from a medical standpoint, this is probably true). What did we say about mixed signals being bad signals in disguise?

I wish I could say all this is based on science and not panic, but I am not sure that’s the case. This week, Walter Ricciardi, the Italian scientist advising the health ministry, said that Milan and Naples should be locked down immediately because anyone can catch Covid just by walking into a bar, although I feel he was just projecting what he wanted his success with women to be like. I’m sorry to break the news to you, Walter, but if this was true, we would have all had it by now.

Having said that, the growth in cases is accelerating, so the stricter measures do make sense. In fact, it seems like we are also headed towards a brand new national lockdown, since news of this unsurprisingly leaked a week in advance. I haven’t seen so many leaks since that time some builders in London decided to fix the roof insulation of the building I lived in, but in the process managed to remove all the waterproofing by Friday, and then took the weekend off. It rained a lot that weekend.

We spent our last Saturday of semi-freedom buying plants, so we can watch them disintegrate with us during lockdown 2.0.